It’s Self-Evident, All Flyers are Created Unequal

Yesterday, while traveling from San Jose to Seattle, it suddenly dawned on me that I’m an air travel “Have Not”. Which is probably a good thing since everywhere else I’m a “Have”.

Air travel “Haves” zip through special “pre-TSA screening” security checks; wait with other “Haves” in special “members only” lounges that are probably decked out with soft frozen yogurt machines; and board way before you and me.

Alaska Airlines employs an especially detailed caste system for boarding passengers.

1st—Russell Wilson.

2nd—Families with babies.

3rd—First class.

4th—Gold platinum members.

5th—MVP Elite members.

6th—Those people who can pronounce Ta-Nehisi Coates correctly.

7th—Ron Byrnes.

2 thoughts on “It’s Self-Evident, All Flyers are Created Unequal

  1. A TSA-PRE pass costs $85 and is good for 5 years. It involves getting fingerprinted, a background check which I passed (indicating it must be pretty easy) and, when the procedure is completed, you are assigned a Known Traveler Number (KTN). Having a KTN allows you to wear your shoes, belt, jacket, etc and not take anything out of your bags (computer, tablet, etc.) while going through security screening. Simply empty your pockets and walk through a metal detector. Makes security almost “enjoyable” while watching the hassles you “have nots” currently face. Money-saving tip – if you have a TSA-PRE Known Traveler Number and book all the tickets under your name then all parties flying with you also receive the TSA-PRE status on their boarding passes. Well worth the money (in my book) but remember . . . “convenience” and “little to zero hassle” rank very highly on the list of items I look for in attempting to enjoy the later years of my life.

    • Very informative, thank you. Now your homework is two more paragraphs, one on how to gain access to the airlines’ private lounges (without flying any more than I have to) and another on how to get to board before all the lower caste flyers (without flying any more than I have to).

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