In case you’re looking for one. In one word, PowerPoint*. So says Jessica Guzik.
And if you’re looking for one, and are not a serious gamer, you should probably limit your search to college grads. Economist Erik Hurst via economist Tyler Cowen on what young men are doing.
In related news, I’m slowly working my way through The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing The Patterns Of Intimate Relationships. I think HLerner knew if she pitched it as a “Woman’s Guide” I couldn’t help myself. Savvy. A pgraph to ponder from the early going:
Making a long-term relationship work is a difficult business because it requires the capacity to strike a balance between individualism (the “I”) and togetherness (the “we”). The tugs in both directions are very strong. On the one hand, we want to be separate, independent individuals—self-contained persons in our own right: on the other, we seek a sense of connectedness and intimacy with another person, as well as a sense of belongingness to a family or group. When a couple gets out of balance in either direction, there is a problem.
The Good Wife and I successfully balance that seesaw about a third of the time. Which if we played professional baseball, would make us All Stars.
*nice to know PowerPoint isn’t a complete catastrophe
Trying to maintain the balance between individualism and independence in long term relationships takes consciousness and hard work. There are great rewards for the folks who get it right!