My writing about my family’s experience with Lynn’s Multiple Systems Atrophy has resonated with a lot of people here and on our CaringBridge site.
A recurring theme is they appreciate the “honesty”. And how I sometimes use humor to lighten things. And many of my readers, like me, are also “on the back nine” and so final chapters are more relevant than if I had a younger, hipper readership.
Honestly though, the “honesty” feedback perplexes me because I feel like I’ve only been able to paint about 15% of the picture. There’s way more that I’m leaving out than I am including.
But maybe, everything really is relative, and people are used to even far less transparency?
Of course, it’s impossible to perfectly quantify how much someone lets their readers in. Just know, when you listen, read, or watch anyone’s story, there’s always way, way more to it. Always.
Why aren’t you and I more forthright with others? More vulnerable? More honest especially about what’s most difficult. And about our related, negative emotions?
As a male, I have the excuse of not having been encouraged to communicate my emotions growing up. But I’m sure that’s true for boatloads of women too. And so that’s a lousy explanation that really doesn’t get at my reticence to be more honest.
Another explanation that I’ve touched on previously is not knowing how to be more honest without compromising others’ privacy. Hell, the picture I included with the last post, I got in trouble for it. Because it was a “tender moment”. Which is exactly why it was such a good picture. So there’s that. Lynn didn’t want me to share her tenderness with you. So what’s a writer to do?
Maybe, if I outlive her, and the odds in Vegas are that I will, I’ll be freed up to paint far more of the picture. Even 16-17%.
Pressing Pause 
I read your post when I was in New Zealand where the sockets for electrical devices are different from the U.S. and Japan, and I was busy throughout the whole time.
Yes, I applaud your honesty in sharing your perspective as a husband but perplexed by “not knowing how to be more honest without compromising others’ privacy”. My wife is like that as well. I don’t have her permission to show photos of her and us, even to my family members. Which puts a big crimp on my recent New Zealand trip.
Wowza, that’s ‘next level’ private. :)
How come I never knew you were on Facebook? Continued prayers for both of you. As far as sharing life details, most of us would lean towards discretion rather than TMI just for safety’s sake. Then there are those in our inner circle to whom we feel comfortable revealing more personal matters. The question then becomes who exactly is within that circle. Not always easy to figure that out, and maybe not worth the emotional energy to do so. The important thing is that you know there are those that genuinely love and care for you. Now accept my friend request or I’ll never speak to you again! 🤪