1A. I will get a lot of texts today from politicians asking for money. 1B. I will grow increasingly annoyed.

2. That is not a Blue Wave forming on the horizon, it’s a Blue Tsunami.

3A. The Minnesota Gophers will beat the UCLA Bruins Saturday. 3B. Afterwards, following a failed attempt to center himself at Saint Mike’s Adoration Friday morning, DDTTM will send me a snarky, no make that mean text, relishing my misfortune.

4. Luka will lead the league in scoring this year.

5. The President will graciously accept having lost the House and Senate. He’ll talk smartly about working with Democrats to do right by the American people.