Category Archives: Money Matters

Let Me Take Care Of It

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‘member when I said one huge advantage of the new crib is the time I’ll save maintaining the much smaller yard?

The truth of the matter is, I kinda like yard work because the results are immediately visible, the exact opposite of my efforts to educate the next gen. Or my efforts to contribute to the common good more generally.

Right now, I’m bouncing back and forth between the old, still unsold house, and the new one. Yes, as a matter of fact, it does take real muscles to lift the mower in the back of the hatchback.

Yesterday, post shitty weather, I hit the Nature Park hard. There were an infinite number of brown pine seeds, leaves, branches, weeds, overgrown shrubs, but they were no match for me. First, blow. Then recharge batt. Then, pick up branches, pick largest weeds, toss pine cones over the outfield wall. Second, trim bushes front and back. Third, take recharged batt and blow a second time, moving bush clippings, leaves, and pine cone seeds into yard. Fourth, suck up said detritus while mowing with bag (verus the usual mulch). Fifth, pick up small branches that mower missed. Sixth, blow again because you can never blow enough.

It looked like like a million dollars. Or more.

A friend in North Carolina referred to “Mow, blow, and go” guys with derision. Screw that. It’s all about mowing, blowing, and going as fast as possible. Get the heart rate up and don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the pretty good.

Maybe when I close the classroom door for the last time, I’ll start a lawn business. Running between two houses is fun, but I imagine running between 10 would be 5x as fun. I’m workshopping names, let me know what you think. I saw a sign/advert yesterday while cycling for Lawn Boys and immediately thought of “Lawn Boy”,” a “take that” to that evil woman at Burgerville. Or maybe,”Mow, Blow, and Go”? Catchphrase, “Let me mow, blow, and go for you.”

The best part of this plan is I’ll have to buy a pickup truck. Well, that and what the GalPal is going to do when she sees my sweaty self get out of the truck after a long day of mowing, blowing, and going. Hubba hubba.

Student-Faculty Ratio To Ponder

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“The nearly 150-year-old University of the Arts in Philadelphia will close its doors June 7. Many of its 1,149 students and about 700 faculty and staff members got the news from an article in the Philadelphia Inquirer on Friday or on social media, only later getting official word from the school.” The New York Times.

Less than two students per faculty/staff member. How did UAP last as long as it did?

So I Mighta’ Got It A Little Wrong

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Long after I’m gone, when historians gather to rank PressingPause’s Top Ten Most Knuckleheaded posts, a very recent one will, in all likelihood*, rise to the top.

I said Melinda Gates was so done with Bill that she was also cutting bait with the male gender.

Then, this. ‘Gender equality is not a zero-sum game’: Men’s think-tank leader receives $20M from Melinda Gates.

Anyone can swing and miss. But it takes special talent to swing, miss, fall down, and tear ligaments in both ankles.

*had to use a tentative phrase here since I’m still alive, writing, and getting stuff wrong

Boycott Burgerville

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Every year this time of year, Mount Bachelor calls, and some crazed cycling friends and I answer. I will not run or swim this week, just turn the pedals. Over and over. Big ups to the daughters for looking after their momsie.

When I travel, I mentally prep by imagining all the bad things happening, canceled flight, middle seat, etc. In this road trip case, construction delays, accidents, and who knows what else.

And therein lies the problem, my imagination wasn’t up to anticipating today’s crisis. There I was pulling into Burgerville for an early lunch before juicing up the electric whip in Sandy. Because I always try to eat healthy during Big Weeks, I said to the speaker, “I’ll have a 16 ounce strawberry shake.” Don’t judge me, it’s fruit, right?!

“$5.99 at the second window.” “Okay, thanks.”

Then, right as I began to finally empty my bulging coin purse, it happened. The crisis I did not anticipate.

“Oh. Senior discount. $5.39.”

Nevermind the carbon fiber bike in the back of the $40k car, Oregon thinks I deserve an “old person” rebate of 60 cents. Hey Oregon, how about discounting Millennial milkshakes since most of them, unlike me weren’t born at the right time to the right two parent family.

Senior discounts don’t make any sense for the half of seniors doing well. But this story isn’t about flawed economic and tax policies. It’s about my ego and how a woman at Burgerville shattered it. It may take all week to recover.

I Can Do It Too

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This guy, whose net worth is over $500m, has a huge following among young sports-minded men. He has won over $2m picking the winner of the last two professional golf events. You can take this to the bank—his recent, short-term luck will translate into hundreds of millions more lost by sports gambling addicts.

Paragraphs To Ponder

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“And therein lies the reality of the entire Bronny James situation. He is a good basketball player … but right now, he is not a great one. He is a freshman still developing. So yes, he makes silly mistakes — like not finishing one second-half cut, which led to a USC turnover and Enfield barking across the court with his pointer finger extended. But he also has promising flashes. It’s a mixed bag. It’s no different than dozens of other talented but raw prospects across the country.

This one just happens to have a stupendous surname.

Take away that bloodline, and Bronny James is a multi-year college player, one who needs to continue honing his skills. Reminder: He is not even a starter now, on one of the most disappointing teams in the worst of all six power conferences, per KenPom. (USC was picked to finish second in the Pac-12 and was ranked No. 21 in the preseason AP poll. The Trojans are one game ahead of Oregon State for last place in the league). What about that suggests this guy is ready for the NBA next season? Absolutely nothing.”

The Athletic.

Take-away for those on their way up. If your parent is arguably the GOAT at their job, follow in their footsteps at your own peril. 

The Cult

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That could’ve been the title of Rob Copeland’s gripping inside look at Ray Dalio’s hedge fund, Bridgewater Associates.

Cults seem to have a few things in common including leaders who combine delusions of grandeur with atypical charisma. In the Bridgewater Associates cult, Ray Dalio combined delusions of grandeur with unfathomable wealth which he used to maintain a loyal following. Many Bridgewater employees sacrificed their morals, mental health, and general well-being for the prospects of striking it rich.

The gap between Dalio’s public persona as an investing and human relations genius and Copeland’s portrait of an insecure, simple-minded, self-centered, and cruel bully, is a searing indictment of the financial press.

After reading The Fund, one can’t help but be skeptical, if not hopelessly cynical about anybody with a glowing public persona. With no end in sight, we continue to buy what the rich and famous are so desperately selling.

Almost like we’re in a cult.

Sentence To Ponder

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“In 2022, according to the Federal Reserve, the average American household directly or indirectly owned almost $500,000 worth of stocks. But these holdings were concentrated in the highest-income 10 percent of the population; the median household owned only $52,000.” Paul Krugman

File this under “the New Aristocracy”. Relative to the “income gap”, the more pernicious “wealth gap” flies well under the radar.