Who Does Halsey Think She Is?

Thanks to the “invisible enemy”, today, like everyday I cycle now, I traded Olympia’s finest athletes for Khalid, DaBaby, Drake, Billie Eilish, Alice Phoebe Lou, Grimes, the Biebs, Post Malone, Roddy Rich, and Halsey. A pop, hip hop, pop, and more hip hop full meal deal.*

Where does Halsey get off repeatedly singing to me . . .

‘Cause you’re not half the man you think that you are
And you can’t fill the hole inside of you with money, drugs and cars
I’m so glad I never ever had a baby with you
‘Cause you can’t love nothin’ unless there’s somethin’ in it for you

A line-by-line deconstruction . . .

‘Cause you’re not half the man you think that you are—Who do you think you are being all judgy?! Humility is one of my best qualities so I’m probably twice the man I think I am.

And you can’t fill the hole inside of you with money, drugs and cars—Okay, I will give you this one, but if you were a regular reader of the blog you’d know I’m down with Stoicism, so that little bit of life coaching wasn’t all that necessary.

I’m so glad I never ever had a baby with you—Presume much? I don’t ever recall proposing such.

‘Cause you can’t love nothin’ unless there’s somethin’ in it for you—Aren’t ulterior motives lurking just below the surface for most mortals, most of the time?

Since this is a family friendly blog, the lawyers have asked me to ask you to not, like tens of millions other people, go watch Halsey’s racy “You Should Be So Sad” video.

*The airpods are in only when not in congested areas that require all the senses all the time. Do not try this at home.

 

 

 

Post Malone

Dude makes music. Haven’t I aged out of hippity hop by now? Hell no. If I make it to 66, 76, 86, or 96, I will still be rocking the hippity when I’m bench pressing the 45lb. bar.

For the uninitiated, give these three tracks a whirl:

White Iverson

“When I started ballin’ I was young
You gon’ think about me when I’m gone
I need that money like the ring I never won, I won

Saucin’, saucin’, I’m saucin’ on you
I’m swaggin’, I’m swaggin’, I’m swaggin’ oh ooh
I’m ballin’, I’m ballin’, Iverson on you
Watch out, watch out, watch out, yeah
That’s my shot, that’s my shot, that’s my shot, yeah
Spendin’, I’m spendin’ all my fuckin’ pay”

And of course. . .

“Fuck practice, this shit just happens, know y’all can’t stand it
I have it, I’ll never pass it, I work my magic”

I’m working on a parallel track. White Bird.

Congratulations!

“My mama called, seen you on TV, son
Said shit done changed ever since we was on
I dreamed it all ever since I was young
They said I wouldn’t be nothing
Now they always say congratulations
Worked so hard, forgot how to vacation
They ain’t never had the dedication”

Forgot how to vacation. Reminds me of me.

Up There

“I wanna go up there and I don’t ever wanna come down
I wanna see what’s up there, actin’ like I got it all figured out
I wanna go up there and I don’t ever wanna come down
I wanna see what’s up there, must be better than the hell on the ground”

The Trump administration getting to him too.